Jul 12, 2010

FNILHM, (florence ngala is losing her mind).


Yesterday, I went to Barnes and Noble as I often do, because I like reading things when people don’t make me (cough cough English class) and I’m usually down with the Teen Vogue and Seventeen, but once I started going to Barnes and Noble more often, I couldn’t keep waiting for the next Teen Vogue or Seventeen to come out, so I discovered other magazines like Nylon for example. NOTE: NYLON IS BASICALLY ONE OF THE THINGS I LIVE FOR NOW. I also discovered magazines that have pretty editorials that are from out of the country that are shipped to Barnes and Noble like MUSE and PURPLE magazines, yesterday since I’d b asically read everything that I wanted to in the fashion section, I went over to the music section, and I discovered TOKION magazine, which has music and fashion and these amazing photos and FMS, (Fashion, Music, Style). This is similar to Tokion but a little smaller and is more music related and WAX POETICS, to whom I give credit for taking my hip hop virginity, this magazine is just mostly about hip hop music. I sat in Barnes and Noble and read through the magazines and some of the stuff that was in them I thought was so interesting that I got out a pen and a napkin and started taking notes on some of the music that I wanted to listen to or rappers that I was gonna look up on Youtube or and some photographers that I wanted to look up. So then I left Barnes and Noble and had to go to Pathmark and while I was shopping with my mom and my siblings, I started to lose my mind a little because I had eaten about 100 jelly bellies that day, true story, those jelly beans are amazing. And I started spazzing out in the store and dancing to the 80s music that they were blasting while playing air guitar with a spaghetti sauce jar, by the time we left Pathmark and got home, since I was high off jelly beans I didn’t realize that I had LOST my napkin with all the wonderful notes I took, if you’re thinking “Florence it’s just a napkin” then you don’t know how it feels to work hard on something and lose it, and--- well you know what WHO ASKED YOU? CAUSE IT WASN’T JUST A NAPKIN, CAUSE I WROTE ON IT, TWO AND A HALF NAPKIN PAGES. And because I can’t STAY FOCUSED EVER, I LOST MY NAPKIN, the same way I lost my chance for going to lake placid because I lost my focus and didn’t want to learn geometry so now I’m in SUMMER SCHOOL, the same way I lose my money shopping because I don’t know how to save and invest in my fucking future, the same way I lose Metrocards because I don’t realize how important they are as the portal between home and school, between life and knowledge and I can’t just I – I can’t just do anything right and I can’t focus and it’s just, it’s just a problem. What a coincidence that I’m listening to Made You Look by Nas, have a listen… “they shooting, oh I made you look you a slave to a page in my rhyme book” well, to be quite honest, if someone was shooting, I probably would look instead of focusing on running and then I would be killed, and you know what would happen?... I’ll tell you, I’d LOSE my fucking life.


Peace, love and focus. Your fave bamf flo, whose blog keeps her sane.

right hizzur--------------------------->